Memory Lane

 A couple of years ago, I'm this blogger who update (quite) regularly. Usually it's random thoughts, book reviews or poetry. I also love to hop from one blog to another. I followed some infamous blogger too. Sometimes I read across this interesting blogger and I started following them. One of them is Naomi Neo. Her old blog is pretty much still here. I remember one of her writing after a bad broken heart she went through. The title of her writing is 'The People Who Care Enough Will Show it to You' the introduction felt like a pang to me :

"I kinda grew up believing that everyone's nice and I always choose to see the good in people instead of their shortcomings - I tend to find reasons or rather excuses for them whenever they disappoint me. Like if someone decides to only text me after 2 days of disappearing, I'd convince myself they were just busy. Or when someone tries to manipulate me into thinking I've done something wrong when they were they ones who clearly made a mistake, I'd lie to myself that perhaps they are right."

Y same *sighs*. I tend to think positively towards people and I look the other way on whether they deserve it or not. 

"Took me a lot of regrets and mistakes to finally realise I've to stop making excuses for them, because the people who care enough will show it to you." 

The last few months of 2020 seemed like they wanna wake  me up to that one simple dang fact. Because as harsh as it might be, some people do not deserve that kind of 'positive thinking' for you. If anything, they might take advantage of them and only use you as their doormatt. Okay, some people went through A LOT. Sometimes all they wanna do is just minimizing their social interaction for a while. Including with you, and that's fine. They might wanna clear up their mind a little. That, we should pay respect to, yes. 

However, we should draw the line between 'taking some time off' and 'deliberately ghosting people', the second one doesn't worth your time. Personally, I never ask much. I just want a clear answer when I text 'Hey are you alright'? Perhaps something like 'No. I need some time alone.' Believe you me, people who think I might get mad or think negatively about them because of that are not those whom I want to call 'friends'. 

Yes, I said that. My 'friends' know perfectly well that I hate being ghosted. They know that if I want some time alone, I will tell them that I'm busy/ unwell. Why? Because they're my friends and I respect their feelings. Being ghosted sucks. People can get very, very upset (to put it mildly) because of being ghosted. So for the love of God, do be so kind as to tell your friends that you want to be alone. Guess what? They don't think you're owing them anything, but don't you think they deserve an answer when they ask about how are you doing? 

If you don't think so, then let's agree to disagree, shall we? Because right now I just want to sit back, relax and enjoy what I have. And I am not responsible to anyone's mental well being.